I've discovered in an ancient Mayan scroll, that I picked up in a charity shop this morning, that Teignmouth will entirely escape the Apocalypse that will engulf the rest of the world tomorrow. I'm sorry only to be telling you now, but I had to get here to find an Internet connection. Anyway, if you can get here this evening, you'll be fine.
Meanwhile, the impending disaster enables me to indulge my love of The Cure, with a collection of appropriate videos you could watch while you wait.
This is 'Disintegration'.
'I leave you with photographs
Pictures of trickery
Stains on the carpet and
Stains on the memory
Songs about happiness murmured in dreams
When we both of us knew
How the end always is.'
I was going to add 'End' here, but mostly for the words:
'I think I've reached that point
where every word that you write
of every blood dark sea
and every soul black night
and every dream you dream me in
and every perfect free from sin
and burning eyes and hearts on fire
are just the same old song.'
Instead, I offer 'Alt. End.'
'Yeah it's a big bright beautiful world out there
Just the other side of this door
Six billion beautiful faces await
But I saw it all before...
No this is not about running out on you
Not a case of right or wrong
It's only that it's over and done for me
It's already been and gone.'
And, finally, of course 'The End of the World.'
'Maybe we didn't understand
It's just the end of the world...
Maybe we didn't understand
Not just a boy and a girl
It's just the end of the end of the world...'
So there we are. I hope you are able enjoy the last few hours as much as I am. I've been telephoning Julia Bradbury (she hasn't made her mind up yet; she seems to think there might be a morning after). I've nearly emptied the wine cellar. I drove up and down the M27 at 100mph. I didn't shave this morning. Actually, I didn't clean my teeth either, What's the point? Oh, the end of the world is such fun and so liberating!