Tuesday 7 August 2012

GALLIC WARS

Sorry I haven't been around your sites much.  Two days of doctor and hospital appointments (and nil by mouth for 6 hours) left me a bit, what shall we say, happier asleep on the sofa watching property programmes on television (yes, it's possible to do both) than trying to think and type at the same time (leave alone walk to the next room).

Anyway, here's the good news.  It's gall stones.  Well, semi-good news; they could still be the symptom of something else nasty, but we now know what's causing all the other symptoms. 

I suspect it'll mean surgery.  I've never had surgery, or even hospital treatment, before.  So that'll be interesting.  And I always fancied sitting up in one of those beds on wheels and having a nurse plump my pillows and feed me porridge.

Then there's the bad news.  Well, first there could be something else, but I'm ruling that out.  Second, I doubt I'll be in hospital long enough to have anything plumped.  Gall stone removal seems to be one of those in out keyhole procedures these days.  I might not even get any porridge!

Third, when on earth am I going to have time for this?  I've already cancelled 2 bridge matches and a birthday drinks a) because I can't see myself getting through a whole match and continuing to concentrate and b) because I'm not drinking at the moment.  Still, I suppose, if it is an in out procedure, I might be back on my feet quick enough to get on with life without missing too much.

But then there's the other question.  If they weren't caused by some other nasty, one assumes the stones were caused by diet.  OK, I eat butter and drink blue top milk every day, and I like sausages and big breakfasts and fish and chips.  But I don't eat any of those often.  And my diet is otherwise boringly exemplary and healthy.  So will I have to give up anything in my diet?  Will I have to live on boiled chicken and jello for the rest of my life?  I suppose the other good news is that, if it's taken all this time to form stones with my diet, there won't be time for them to form again once these are removed.  So perhaps I just keep on with this diet.

Isn't it wonderful, incidentally, how a vist to the doctors can make you feel better immediately!

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