Thursday, 13 December 2012


Grumpy Old Man Blog #34

Don't you still hate cranberries.  Some of you may remember that, a while ago, I complained about the number of products we were now seeing over here with cranberries unnecessarily added to them.  Well, I still hate them!  And they get into everything.  Uninvited.  Smoothies, juices, cereals, pop groups; the list is endless.  It's either an Ocean Spray plot to take over the world or there's a world glut and they have so many of the damn things they have to hide them in other foods.  Well hide them in someone else's food, thank you very much.  Or better still - leave them in the trees or under the ground or wherever they come from.  All that trouble to pick them (or dig them up) and then nowhere to put them except in my breakfast, and lunch, and even in my dinner.

Strawberry, blueberry, banana and cranberry smoothie.  What's the cranberry for?  It's no doubt because cranberries taste so tart on their own that no one can eat them without concealing them under other fruit or tons of sugar.  Well just leave them out then!

Stilton with cranberries.  Agh!  What's so wrong with Stilton that we can't have it without cranberry contamination?  Stilton with red spots?!

Last night I had pate, served on little water biscuits.  They looked rather nice.  'Oh, I hope you like these,' said the hostess.  'The pate has cranberries in it.'  In a pate!!  What's that all about?

Then today I was offered mince pies.  'These are made with cranberry mincemeat for a change.'  Cranberry mincemeat!!!  Surely that's an oxymoron?  I have been eating mincemeat ever since it was invented and never has it required cranberries in it.  That lovely brown, sweet, aromatic, almost meaty flavour, sticky with syrup and sultanas!  Not a bit reddy in colour and stuck with cranberries!!  'No, I'll have the original sort, thanks.  That last one was fabulous!  Full of fruity flavour and oozing sugar'.  'But that was a cranberry one.'  Oh.


  1. They must be 'stealth cranberries', I hadn't even noticed their infiltration. I will have to be more vigilant in future.

  2. It's hard to find fruit juice that is just one juice. Read the ingredients and it might say has grape or carrot other juice added! I wanted just plain grapefruit juice and it is hard to find. I do like cranberries but I don't want them mixed with other things.

  3. If you had every suffered from cystitis (and being a man I really hope not), you would be grateful for the powers of cranberry juice. you would proclaim it as a gift to pain healing. Speaking as a 20-30 year sufferer, I blessed the day when it was discovered that cranberry juice helps. It helped me, although my main cure was from a 7 hour operation when they removed my siamese twin sister cells which decided to start growing when I was 50 years old. (Another story, not for now). apart from that I like them. They are not so sweet as other berries, and do a great muffin. I was glad to see that in England you can buy cranberry juice with no problem. Here in Switzerland it is very expensive, as you can only get it in a "drogerie" which is something like a chemist. So Long Live the Cranberry.

    1. Yes, I have looked them up before and discovered they are a natural cure for many things, or at least a supplement to strengthen you against many. I don't need to drink cranberry juice though; I get quite enough cranberries hidden in the rest of my food.

  4. I like 'stealth (thanks Mitch) cranberries'. Particularly in cheese.

    Am I off your Xmas Card list as a result Neil?

  5. You probably understand that I eat them all the time, Ian. Inevitably. And they're not nearly as irrelevant as pomegranate 'jewels'. Don't worry, you're still on the list of people I wouldn't deliberately ignore when sending out Christmas cards.